Last Resort
by Spartan-458
Summary: Edward returns, broken from the most recent war, however the very things that gave him hope now fill him with despair. He turns from those he cares for the most to that of town to a woman that despises his existence almost as much as he does.
1. Prologue

Author's Notes: As you can tell from the summary, this story is slightly AU due to the fact I started it before I saw the end of the series and the movie. It takes place in the same world and everything just instead of Edward being sent to Germany he remains in his world. Alphonse still received his body back however in the end it cost Edward his arm. Remaining at his own world however set off a chain of events that resulted in another war. I hope you enjoy and please review!

Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist or any of the characters. This is just a weird twisted creation that comes from something called my mind.

**Last Resort**

_By: Spartan-458_

War…that one words takes, disturbs, and changes lives. There is nothing positive that comes out of this one word. If you ask me, I think they should take it out of the dictionary. Whoever came up with such a word should've been tried to see if he was a lunatic. 'Cause I've seen this one word and what it can do. It's like a fire, even after the initial outburst, the wounds it leaves behind still burn…

0 0 0 0 0

I was left with a decision, a clear cut one. I could live or die. It was all up to me and no one would judge me any different. Only I would know that I had given up…however that was enough. I couldn't die here, not like this. I had entered this war as a favor for a friend, but once I got out of here, I was done with damn favors.

The cell smelled of things I would rather not think about though it was hard not to place the overwhelming stench that seemed to hang in the air as urine. There was a slimy film on the walls that you didn't want to know what it was. Yes, nice, I know. There was no cot so they just laid be upon what I think was suppose to be wood. It was held up against the stone wall with rusty chains. To tell the truth, I was half expecting them to break any moment and I'd end up on the floor with the rats for company. It was a comforting thought. At the moment though, I was in no shape to complain. My side was bleeding badly, the blood spilled onto the wood covering it in the warm crimson liquid. Those damn guns…they hurt like hell. I was fortunate enough to have the bullet come out the other side. Then again, I was unlucky to have such a deep wound.

I blinked trying to focus, however, the dim light didn't help this task by any length of imagination. I remember being knocked unconscious; the explosion almost did me in permanently. If I hadn't used my alchemy at that moment to throw up some sort of shield I would've been long gone. Laying here now, however, I realized I wasn't in much better shape.

I lifted by fingers realizing I could move my left arm, well that was nice to know. The real question was…no response. I tried to move my right arm again, yet still nothing. I blinked looking down only to realize I had nothing to move. Shit. This was just great. I was left with a metal coated stump and a few wires dangling. They had taken my arm away knowing that without it I could no longer do alchemy without a transmutation circle. As long as they kept away anything to write with from me, they'd be fine. I guess I was the Three-Quarters Alchemist now…corny pun I know, but I'm not really in the mood to be funny.

Right now I don't think I could draw a transmute circle if my life depended on it. I had lost a lot of blood and my body was reminding me constantly of such. It took everything I had not to shut my eyes go to the ominous sleep that wanted so badly to take me over. Live or die. I remember the days when this line was clearly drawn. I knew exactly what I would do and that it was right. Now however, the line has blurred. It would've been so easy to just let the darkness over take me and die within this rioting world, yet there was something that was stopping me every time I felt my eyelids go heavy.

It was there but I knew I could never go to it. Why? 'Cause every time I shut my eyelids flashes of those I cared for came to me. Al…Winry…if I lived for anybody it would be for the two of them.

Al and I had gone through hell and back to restore what we had lost. He had finally gotten his body back, however the whole thing had cost me my arm. It was a small price to pay though. Those memories…it was a wonder we survived at all.

Winry…I could see just how furious she'd be if she knew I lost my arm. Then again, I knew she'd be happy to know that was all I lost. That blonde hair girl I grew up with was no longer a girl. She had become a woman and had her own very successful automail shop. I, of course, was still her number one customer. I felt something deep within me sink was I left her at that train stop. I won't forget how the tears ran down her face as she placed my hand against her cheek. I embraced her, wishing I could stay and just be by her side. The little blonde girl had caught my heart without me realizing it…

Thinking of the two of them, I made a choice. I would survive this fire of hell and come out on the other side. I swore to it as I laid there staring up at the dark ceiling. I made my choice, I would live…


	2. Chapter One: Who Says You Can't Home?

Author's Note: Thanks for the review! I hope to see more+hint, hint+ Well, here is the next chapter. Read, review, enjoy. 'Til next time!

- Spartan-458**  
**

**Chapter One :** _Who Says You Can't Go Home?  
_

"Idiot! Get down!" a voice shouted echoing off the broken walls.

They were pushing forward, the rebels drawing back. This was the last battle, this would be it. After this, those left alive could go home. The very thought of home gave the soldiers a new hope within as they charged. Both sides wanted this to be over, the rebels had lost heart. They just wanted this torture to end.

"Damn, we can't get by that barricade!" a lieutenant shouted into the small communicational device he held.

"Find a way!" the former Colonel snapped.

At such an high rank he wasn't allowed to fight beside his comrades. It was too dangerous they stated. Damn them, he had lost more good men in this shity war than he felt was necessary all do to higher-ups' poor planning.

Suddenly, a huge explosion set the barricade flying. Bodies spun through the air only to rain down like dolls being thrown. The guns crumpled with the disastrous explode. The soldiers ducked for cover. Everyone paused, having no idea what had happened. Slowly, the lieutenant peered from his foxhole.

Standing there was a man around eighteen however, his golden eyes held a coldness to them that made him appear much older. He wasn't very tall however, that didn't make him look any less menacing. The lieutenant only stared. He couldn't believe his eyes.

"What is going on out there?" Mustang demanded.

"Holy shit! It's Fullmetal!" the Lieutenant exclaimed.

"What?" Mustang blinked.

They had declared him dead two years ago…damn, that boy just never did give up did he?

The soldiers peeked from their hiding places not necessarily scared of the enemies but of this strange young man that had appeared. Physically, he looked young, yet there was a hardness to his gaze however that could make you freeze, like he could see every black spot on your soul and knew exactly how it got there. His golden eyes flashed with a raging anger that no one wanted to be on the other end of when it was released. They stayed back, too scared to even draw his attention to them.

He only had one arm, the other was diminished to a metal stump. His chest was covered with dried blood, most of it being others. His shirt had been torn to shreds a long time ago leaving his chest bare. He simply stepped down into the wreckage ignoring that his crimson carpet was really blood that had dried upon the broken stones of what once was a small town. The town had been reduced to nothing through the duration of this war. He was sick of it: it was time it stopped here.

He walked his eyes focused on only one person and that was of the lieutenant who stared wide-eyed back.

"I-I'm sorry sir, they said you were dead…" the man stuttered.

Edward walked up to him staring hard, though the man was a good six inches taller, who was more dangerous in this situation was blindingly obvious. "I made a hole for you. Go." was all he said as he held out his hand for the radio.

"Y-yes sir." the lieutenant fumbled the small electronic device before placing it into the only hand Edward had at the moment. "Come on, men! You heard him!" the Lieutenant shouted happy to get out of this man's sight.

Edward only took the radio and clicked it on, "Mustang?"

No response.

"Mustang? Answer damn it! I know you're there!" he snapped at it.

"…I'm here Edward." he replied.

Mustang always thought the name Fullmetal didn't fit the kid, now though, Edward had grown into his name, in heart and soul.

"Get me out of this hell hole."

0 0 0 0 0

The days after that lingered on. I knew exactly what I'd do when I got home. I'd hug my brother and tell Winry exactly how I felt. It was the thought of both of them at home, waiting for me that kept me going back in that rotting cell. I thought I had finally paid my dues for everything I had done throughout my life, in fact, I over paid. Being in that war had turned a part of me into ice: solid steel. I had given up a part of my soul for this damn war and I had nothing to show for it except scars and memories that would send others screaming.

I watched lazily as the trees, flowers, and other forms of various vegetation rushed by in a blur. My head was propped up by my hand which in turned was sitting upon the seal of the window. The seat opposite me was empty; it's ugly red upholstery glaring. Whoever had decided to interior decorate the trains had done a lousy job if you asked me. Everything was a bright vivid color making it hard to look at anything inside the car, so your only choice was to stare outside. And what if you got motion sickness and couldn't do that? You were screwed.

The military had given me a new attire for the trip home. It was a bunch of some frilly and fancy shit I would never be caught dead in so I sided with the plain white collared dress shirt and a pair of crisp khakis. It was an outfit you could never go wrong with. Though one arm hung limply with nothing to shape it, it looked kinda odd dangling there, but I had long given up caring.

There upon the crest of a hill peeked the roof of the train station. The fact was Rizenbul was just too tiny of a town to have it's own train station so we had to pull into a more populated city and then get a ride from there.

I shifted a bit, uncomfortable. For some reason it didn't feel right to return. Silly, I know, but I wasn't the Edward Elric that used to live here. Hell, I wasn't the same Edward that felt for the war. I felt like a stranger rather than someone returning home. As the train pulled up, I stared at the looming buildings. Shops lined the streets: their wares glittering in the sunlight. People talked in the streets: some laughing in glee. Celebrations had popped up all over the land since the peace treaty had finally been signed. People said that a great peace would follow. God, I hoped so.

The train screeched to a stop and people began to stir and stretch, getting ready to unload. Even that weird man in the funny hat finally moved.

I stood up stretching a bit before reaching up and grabbing my one suitcase from the overhang. I was too late however, people lined up, pushing to get off this enclosed car just one second faster. So I sat back down with my suitcase on my lap and waited patiently. I had waited two long years to see my brother again, I could wait a few more minutes.

The car was empty before I moved to get off. I didn't care for crowds and people as I once had when I was younger. Younger? No, I think the word I was looking for should have been more naïve. I grabbed the worn handle from the second-hand suitcase the military had so kindly given to me and headed down that sickening green carpet of the car.

I turned once I reached the front seeing the door open, slipping the evening sun's rays into the steel car. A silhouette however blocked most of it. I stepped out of the car my arm thrown over my eyes to see just who it was.

He looked just as I had imagined him: taller, leaner, and that same gentle look in his eyes. They were wide full of that hope that he had always carried with him no matter where we had gone. His hair was a bit longer, looking a little disheveled as if he had run his hand through it more than once. He wore a simple long sleeved shirt with a tan vest and dark brown pants. His brown eyes held the edge of tears to them. Why? I wasn't sure, but that was Alphonse for ya, kindness in a human form. Yes, human…at least there was one thing in my life I had done right.

"Brother!" his voice wasn't a child's anymore. It had deepened with age and maturity.

He wrapped his arms around me and squeezed tightly, too tight if you asked me. I think he bruised a rib. I felt myself smile, something I hadn't done in ages. It felt like twisting a long rusted handle finding it to only half work correctly. I tried my best to return the embrace but it's kind hard with only one arm.

Noticing this immediately, he let go and stepped back his eyes focused on my right arm, or where my right arm was supposed to be.

"Where's your automail?" he blinked.

"It's a long story, to make it short it isn't coming back. I just hope Winry saved the original plans." I smiled finally happy to be among someone who knew me…or at least…I hope he still did.

"Yeah." Al replied chuckling a bit, though it was strange as if it was almost forced.

"Al what's wrong?" I asked, nice to know I at least still knew him.

"Nothing," he said all too quickly, "It was just when you didn't come off right away. I thought….I thought…" he couldn't bring himself to say it.

I placed my hand on his shoulder only to realize he had grown to be several inches taller than me. Damn, that just wasn't fair. "That I wasn't coming back? Come on, Al you know me better than that." I dropped my hand, "Let's get going, I'm sick of hanging around at train stops." I smiled but it didn't come even close to reaching my eyes.

Something about Al's actions made me think something else was bothering him, but what?

What…sometimes that's a question that's better left unanswered.

I climbed into the carriage that I assumed Al had taken here and laid my arm on the cut out window of carriage. Alphonse quietly climbed in leaving me to stare at the hills that had once been my very stomping grounds as a child. They seemed so foreign now like they didn't belong to me.

"Ed?" his voiced echoed through my mind cutting my thoughts in two.

I blinked as I looked at him, "Yeah?"

He didn't say anything at first so I decided to fill this weird silence, "You know what?" I didn't wait for him to respond. "In that cell only two things kept my going: you and Winry. As an older brother I couldn't leave you to fend off this shity world by yourself, besides you're too kind-hearted. People will take advantage of that, and Winry…?" I rambled on.

I realized I had never told anyone this since I as found, well Al would always be my brother that was fact. If I couldn't trust him, then who could I trust?

"I'm in love with her Al," I stared out the window not looking at him or his reaction, "I didn't realize it until I was locked in that cell, but I do now. When you are locked up for two years you have plenty of time to get things straight." I forced a smile however it was useless.

When I turned to look at him his eyes were wide with fear. I blinked staring at him, it wasn't that much of a surprise was it? I didn't think it was at least.

"Al?" I asked wondering why he was giving me such a look.

He only looked down staring at the floor. What the hell was going on here? Alphonse always told me everything or at least that was how it used to be. Had things changed that much? The one thing I thought would always be stable, something for me to fall back on... damn. The war was still tearing at me and if I wasn't careful it'd tear me to pieces.

"Alphonse?" I tried once more.

The rest of the ride was an eerie silence.

I thought I had gotten away from all the pain when I stepped off that battlefield. Little did I know it would seek me out all the way here…

The first question I'd like to ask is why? What have I ever done to deserve this shit? Am I still repaying for past sins? How much do I have to suffer, I've given up everything even parts of my own soul to atone for them, isn't that enough?

It obviously wasn't…


	3. Chapter Two: Two Years Too Late

Author's Note: First off, I would like to say I am sorry if I have led any EdxWinry fans on to this point. This is not a EdxWinry fanfiction. I really don't have anything against Winry, she was just the only character I could really choose to fulfill her role in this story. This is an EdxOC fanfiction and before you roll your eyes and groan "just what we need ANOTHER fan-based character" I suggest you read on in the fanfiction, you may just be surprised. I mean afterall...it's coming from my brain...who knows WHAT could be lurking in there...+shifting eyes+ Thanks to my loyal reviewer and those that have put me on their favorites and alerts. And the cry of author's everywhere: please review!

-Spartan-458

**Chapter Two:** _Two Years Too Late_

She came running towards me her blonde hair had been cut short to just above her shoulders and she had grown out her bangs. She could've dyed it for all I cared, she was still the Winry I had left. Her blue eyes shone with the tears of joy. She wore a spaghetti strapped peach top with a pair of faded jeans. It wasn't much, but it pointed out her nice figure. I felt a smile slip onto my lips as I waited for her to throw her arms around me and I could tell her just how I felt about her these long years but that embrace never came.

She paused just out of arm's reach with a happy yet twisted smile. That was when he appeared. I didn't have any reason to hate the man, yet as soon as he came into view I instantly held a disgust for him. His hair was a longer brown brushed to a perfection. He's eyes were a bright gray that held a sort of shielded look to them. To a veteran of war like me however, they were nothing more than the eyes of a child. He was well built and several inches taller than me. He wore a blue blouse that must have cost a fortune. His black slacks contrasted the outfit perfectly.

I felt the suitcase hit the floor with a bang.

He wrapped his arm around Winry's waist kissing her gently on the cheek. She giggled haplessly like some school girl. Thank god I had grown control over my emotions else my face would have twisted. I wanted to throw up.

"I'm so glad you're back Ed!" Winry finally reached out in a hug.

This time however, I was cold towards her. I think she noticed for she looked up at me when I went rigid. I didn't look down, I couldn't. If I did, I would lose my composure and all would be to hell.

She stepped back into his arm her eyes focused on mine. I looked at her, a level gaze, and ever so slightly I saw her own widen, like she wasn't sure she knew me away more.

Something had created a wound within in me that no blade nor bullet could ever reach. It left me cold and bitter. So I converted back to the same emotion I always fell upon back in the cell. It was the only way you could shield yourself and not go insane. It was either become angry or go numb. It was your choice what part of your soul you gave up.

I had sacrificed so much to stand here once more only to have my love ripped from my arms. It was that moment that I felt the world had passed me by, that time had passed me by. I stood there feeling so detached from everything around me, this joy…this happiness. It felt almost foreign to me as if I should be a part of it yet I don't know how. How much had I lost?

"Ed, this is Zac, my fiancée," Winry smiled as she looked up at the man with a smile.

Zac only offered a warm smile as he offered me his right hand. He was either rubbing in my injury or just being ignorant. I was betting on ignorant. And people say I don't give others the essence of doubt.

"That's one thing about a handshake," I felt my lips twist into a smile that made both of them frown, "you need an arm to do it with." I spoke my tone holding sarcasm that I couldn't resist in placing. I nodded towards my sleeve as it flipped limply.

"Oh…uh…sorry," he spoke obviously feeling bad for his mistake.

"ED! HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU!" Winry placed her hands on her hips and puffed at me.

I remembered how many times I wished for her to say that very thing to me like she had when we were children. Now, however, it was like adding salt to the wound.

"I know Winry," my voice was more clipped and harsh than even I meant for it to be, but one could only take so much.

I picked up my suitcase quite of aware of my longer hair flipping over my face. I only stepped to the side of them and pressed into the house.

"Edward!" I heard a familiar voice that could only belong to one person.

Sure enough, a little old lady came waddling out of the kitchen, a little old pipe in hand. She adjusted her spectacles as if she couldn't believe the man who stood before her. Aunt Pinako for you. The woman was as tough as nails. There was only a few people I made it a note never to cross and she was one of them.

I smiled at the little woman as she embraced me tightly. I returned it a bit awkwardly, however it was enough to satisfy her for she pulled away, probably figured it was due to fact I only had one arm. As she drew away however, she frowned.

"You look thin," she crossed her arms as she gave me the "look."

Truth was, I was underweight, I looked far better than when I had first escaped. I was suffering from malnutrition. That's a thing about being a P.O.W., you don't get full course meals. I could tell when the military was pressing down hard because they gave up feeding us at all. All we got was water.

The only reason why I wasn't a stick was because my muscles had built up over my little stay in the P.O.W. camp. My time wasn't spent lounging around, hell no, we were slavery used for manual labor. You think that's bad? Trying doing it with one arm.

As if she realized this she squeezed my arm and then blinked up at me, confused. I gave a blank look but I could already see the wheels turn behind her eyes. Even though she was a senior plus she was still pretty sharp. She had been around the block enough to know not to pursue the topic further. She got points in my book.

She only stared at me with a weight in her eyes. I only smiled before heading into the kitchen whatever she was cooking smelled good, at least that was what I kept telling myself.

0 0 0 0 0

The next few days were a living hell. Each day I felt more withdrawn, held back, as if I was being denied something I should have. Like a little kid that doesn't understand why his mommy can't afford to buy him that new coat for winter.

The more I was around them all, the more I realized I wasn't the Edward that they all wanted to come back. I guess when I walked those blurred lines I had lost myself. It was a sacrifice I had made thinking it would all be worth it. That I'd come back and return to those smiling faces that I see in these pictures.

I picked up one in particular. It was of Al, Winry, and I. It was back when I was only fifteen, I was wearing that flashy crimson trench coat, a big loopy grin on my face. Winry was resting her elbow on my shoulder, winking at the camera with a board grin, wretch in hand of course. Al towered behind us in his body of cold steel.

Even now those days seemed like ages away. I had started to change even then but it was nothing as opposed to now. I didn't start to really change until my search for the Philosopher's stone started to draw to an alarming end.

As I stared at that picture I began to wonder what happened to that boy. As soon as the thought popped into my mind I quickly disposed of it. I knew I wouldn't like the answer so why torture myself?

"Ed?" I heard Winry call as she stepped out from the hallway.

I looked up at her taking care to make sure my face was blank as I set the picture back. I guess she wasn't satisfied because she glanced at me, then the picture, and frowned.

"I'm finished with your arm," she spoke finally.

I followed her into her home workshop. She had two now. One all the way in Rush Valley and the other, here, where I had always known it to be. Tools were hung up in neat rows and various machines and tool boxes lined the room. She even had collected a few new posters of machines.

I followed her across the old wooden floor to her table, upon it was my metallic arm though bigger and longer than my pervious one. She was careful to make it proportional. Though I was still on the short side I wasn't quite the shrimp I used to be. Yes, I said shrimp.

I simply sat down and started to undo the buttons on my shirt. I had become quite dexterous with my left hand since it was the only one I had for a while. It took off the shirt and draped it over the back of the chair. I faced her, ready.

She had already repaired the wires and the metal that was attached directly to my skin. It wasn't a pleasant experience and I thought nothing had hurt worst…now it seemed…not nearly as bad. I told her such and it unnerved her badly, though she claimed it didn't. I could still read her, oh that's right, she's not the one that changed. Okay, so I was a tad bit on the bitter side. If you were in my shoes you'd be too.

She picked it up delicately, the original had been one of her first masterpieces at the time and therefore she poured everything she had into it. That was one of things I loved about her, she never did a half-ass job. Anything she said she'd do she did it with all her skill and knowledge.

She laid it just hovering above the connector. It was a routine. She'd count to three then connect it. Why? 'Cause it hurt like a bitch, and it was a warning for me it was coming…not that I really needed one.

"One….two….three," she spoke firmly and pushed.

The arm slid into the metal with a clink, that caused me to wince just ever so slightly. I was better at hiding my emotions when I was in pain. Trust, me you don't want to know why.

Once connected however, she didn't withdraw. She only hung her head her blonde locks hiding that pretty face from sight. Her hands were still holding my arm.

"We….I…" she started.

I felt my expression falter, I knew what was coming and I knew it was evitable, but that doesn't mean I had to like it.

"I thought you were dead!" she looked up at me tears streaming down her cheeks and I felt some sort of pain in my chest.

"You have no idea how long I waited…how long I cried when I heard the news," she placed her hands in her lap, balling them into tight fists. "I kept telling myself you'd come strolling back through that door any day now with that big grin of yours, saying it was just a joke. I prayed for it. But one day I met Zac and realized my prayers had gone unanswered." I watched her tears streak down her face.

I felt my heart drop with each word. Damn it, how could she do that to me! I threw up my shields replacing my emotions with a controlled bitterness and anger.

"No Winry, I have no idea how long you waited, but I waited for more than two years, what about you?" my tone was cutting, for it held a cold sourness to it.

Winry looked up at me her eyes had gone wide with horror and pain. She, obviously, wasn't expecting that reply, at least not from me. Well, welcome to my world Winry. It's full of nightmares. If you don't like it then get the hell out.

She started to cry all over again and I couldn't take it. I stood up with such force the chair fell backwards and hit the floor, clattering loudly. Winry withdrew looking at me fearfully. That look: that one look cut me. She was scared of me. Me, Edward Elric, the little boy she had grown up with. What did she think I would do? Hit her? The very thought that she'd think of such hurt more than I wanted it to. I grabbed my shirt from the floor and stormed out of the room. Enough emotional shit for me thank you. Her sobs seemed to haunt me as I headed down the hall.


	4. Chapter Three: The End to Which Never Be

Author's Note: I apologize for the long time it took me to put this chapter up. I've been very busy...not really an excuse I know... > Anyways, I just wanted to give a quick thank you to all those who have reviewed. I truly appreciate it! Read, enjoy, review!

- Spartan-458

**Chapter Three:** _The End to Which Never Began_

"Dinner!" Aunt Pinako hollered.

I spent the next couple of hours laying on my bed thinking…I was faced with another choice and this time I wasn't sure which way would be the best. I could either leave or stay, go or remain. The consequences to both would hurt everyone around me. I was beginning to lean towards leaving…I couldn't stay here, not with Winry so close, yet so far away. It would kill what was left of me.

I sat up and sighed, heading out of the little guest room. What I was met with however, broad-sided me. I walked up to the long wooden table only to see Winry with Zac on one side and Al with…a girl on the other? What the hell? Since when did he have a girl!

Al turned having enough nerve to look sheepish. The girl was attractive, I gave him that. She had long red hair that was pulled back at the sides framing a smooth face. Her eyes were a bright green that held a warm and kind look to them. She wore slim sundress of a paler green so that it made her eyes even appear that much brighter.

She blinked as I entered, I guess not what she was expecting. A smile slipped onto her lips, regardless, in a warm greeting.

"This is my older brother I told you about," Al looked up at me as I drew near.

"Mae, this is my older brother, Edward. Edward this is my girlfriend Mae," he smiled up at me with a happiness I hadn't seen in him in a while.

She smiled. Her voice was soft, a bit of the meek side, "Alphonse has told me so much about you. 'Course, your reputation as Fullmetal is quite impressive as well.

So she wasn't just a pretty face, there was intelligence behind it too. Though she was a bit shy, however it was hard to say whether she was like that to everyone or just me. Still it would be a good match, I could tell. A dominating girl wouldn't be good for my younger brother.

She slowly extended her hand across the corner of the table, shyly, "Why do they call you Fullmetal?" she asked.

It was a question I was used to hearing so it didn't phase me in the slightest. I took her right hand with my own automail one and gave her a small smile.

"Let's just say someone in the military thought they were funny," I spoke plainly.

I watched her eyes widened a bit then dart to Al as if he had forgotten to tell her. She then smiled once more and withdrew her hand onto her lap.

She wouldn't have necessarily been the one I'd pick, but watching those two I guess it didn't matter. Al was grinning from ear to ear like one of those carnival stuff animals you always try to win. As long as he was happy, I would be too.

"Ed, why don't you sit at the head the table tonight?" Aunt Pinako smiled as she laid a pot of some sort of stew upon the wooden table among the various assortments of other types of food.

I nodded before sitting upon the designated spot. I looked over at Winry and she was careful to avoid my gaze, spending her time talking to Zac. Aunt Pinako sat at the foot of the table with a wide grin.

"Well, let's eat," she announced.

A man can only handle so much, even I have my limits, my weak points. They seemed to have forgotten such, or maybe I'm just being cynical, but what occurred, I felt, was uncalled for. It was like adding salt to the wound, and it stung like a bitch.

"Here Winry, try this." he held the fork out for her as if she wasn't damn well able to do it for herself.

What pissed me off was that she took it! She took the bite and crewed thoughtfully before smiling at him like some lovesick kid. Okay, I know they were engaged and all, but could they have at least had enough couth to not do this damn little act in front of me!

I clenched my utensil with force as I stared at my plate. The fact it started to bend didn't bother anyone, they were too wrapped up in their own little conversations, well expect for Al. It was nice I could still count on him. He stopped in mid-bite his eyes slightly widening. He seemed to be the only one aware that my temper was rising dangerously, or maybe he was the only one that remembered what I was capable of when angered.

"Hey that's really good Aunt Pinako what is it?" Winry smiled, her back obviously turned towards me as she talked.

"I didn't make that, Zac did," Pinako shook her head.

Winry smiled dreamily at him enough to make me gag. Luckily I wasn't eating, with a twisted fork it's kinda hard to do so.

Winry went on leaning into the bastard with a smile I had never seen before, "So you can cook too. Wow, I am getting a bargain."

When he wrapped his arm around her, I drew the line.

Perhaps it was out of habit to do alchemy when I was hurt due to my recent experiences in the art of war, but whatever the reason, I clapped my hands together. The loud smacking noise seemed to echo.

That sure brought Winry's head around, this time with her eyes wide.

I slammed my hands on the table rattling anything that sat upon it. Al gripped his chair's arms, staring at the table not knowing what the hell I had just did. Surprise, surprise. I had enough of this torture. I had gone through enough pain in that damn cell, does it really have to continue even after?

The stew began to boil over, slipping onto the table in a hot following stream. Chairs fell to the ground as Zac, Winry, and Al stood up, the other two only scooted back from the mess.

"Edward!" Aunt Pinako shouted at me.

My eyes caught Winry's. I know for a fact Winry is a strong-spirited girl so when I met her cold gaze with my own and it faltered, it made me wonder just what the hell I had become? Her eyes widened in something that cut more deeply than anything that had occurred here, it was a look that told she had no idea who the man was that stood before her.

I did the only thing I could, I walked out of the room, focused on only one thing. I had to get the hell of here.

"He did alchemy!" I could hear Mae's surprise break the silence.

"He doesn't need a transmutation circle…" Al's grim tone was the last thing I heard.

I was tired, tired of pain, tired of being left behind, tired of acting like everything was normal, I was tired of a lot of things. What happened had only confirmed my worst fear. I couldn't just come back and expect everything to be the way it was when I was younger. I had changed, they had changed, the only thing that stays the same is that everything changes. I didn't want to face this reality so that was why I lasted as long as I did. Denial can be a powerful thing. There are some things that even I can't deny and the fact I didn't belong here was one. It was the clearest cut choice I had been offered for a while now.

I opened my suitcase and jammed my clothes in, still bitter and hurt. I didn't have a lot of things so it didn't take anytime to pack. I slammed it shut, locking it. I grabbed the brown trench coat I had picked up at the store only a few days ago and slipped it on.

As I walked out of my room I paid no attention to the conservation seeping from the kitchen, I don't think they even noticed I was heading out until they heard the front door slam.

Shit. It was raining. That was my luck inside and out. I only pushed myself forward as I stepped off the slender porch unto the muddy road that the hooves of horses and wagon ruts had destroyed and trampled down. It wasn't thundering or lightning out, at least not yet, but a steady down pour was soaking my hair and coat no less. I didn't give a damn, all I knew was I had to get out of here and get out now.

I suddenly heard the door open and a voice shout at me, "Edward!"

I paused wincing just a bit, hadn't she done enough?

"Edward, I'm sorry," Winry's voice cracked, she was practically on the edge of tears. "Don't go…please"  
"Winry…I can't do that." my own voice sounded cold, even to me.

"Why!" She shouted at me, I didn't have to turn around to know she was crying.

I felt a false smile creep up my face as I turned around meeting her own pain-streaked blue eyes with my golden ones, "I am in love with you Winry, and I can't do this. I can't stand by and watch you in another man's arms. I can't stay here, not any longer. It'll end up killing what's left of me."

I might as well have lied, it would've done less damage at least. Winry stared to sob she clenched the doorway as she stared at me her eyes holding so much pain I had to turn back around.

"Goodbye…Winry,"

I told lies and I've told the truth. I've gone down both roads, and no matter what I do, I feel like shit.


	5. Chapter Four: A Bad Liver and a Broken

Author's Note: Thank you to all who have reviewed! I know it has been ages since I last updated...like everyone else I have a hectic life. I was pretty stressed out today so I watch the FMA movie to calm me down. It reminded me that I still have this story to put up...so here you go!

**Chapter Four:** _A Bad Liver and a Broken Heart_

I should've stop after the fifth drink, I should've died as a sacrifice for the Philosopher's Stone, I should've saved Nina, I should've done a lot of things. Looking back now- all that I had been through, all that I had done. What did I have to show for it? Nothing but a damn metal arm and a lifetime of memories I could do without. What about equivalent exchange? I didn't see any damn Philosopher's Catalyst or Stone anywhere so what about the law? Where the hell is my piece of the freaking pie!?!

I stared at the glass letting the scotch whirl in a circle. I had never been much of a drinker, but for tonight, I'd made an exception. With a sigh, I downed the last sip and set the glass down staring at it, watching it blur. I had caught the first train out of the area near Rizenbul. It was going east, hell if I cared. I didn't get off until the end of the line. It was some city, slightly run down in places. It was not the run down due to a poor society, but the run down of just old structures and buildings that needed restoring.

I told myself I didn't care about them. That I didn't give a damn what Winry or anyone else did, but I did, and that's what hurt so much. I never imagined coming back from that atrocity that I'd be met with this. It just seemed so wrong to me, all of it. Like it was some nightmare that I'd awake from. Man, did I wish that was true.

I glanced at the bottle the bartender had set in front of me. It took me a moment to realize I had downed the whole thing. I watched one drop slide down the side and settle at the bottom. I felt exactly like it. I was at the bottom of my own bottle. Those days of when we were children, hell even the days of searching for the Philosopher's Stone seemed so far away. It was like it wasn't me that had done those things, but someone else. I felt as if someone had just told me the story and I was living through it that way. Those days were long gone, burnt away by the flames war, leaving me to sift through the ashes.

"Hey, don't you think you've had enough kid?" the bartender was in his late forties and by the frown I could tell he didn't approve of my drinking.

I stared at the empty glass, not liking the person who stared back so I pushed it away. I reached in my pocket pulling out some money and laid it on the counter, not caring if it was more than the amount and slid off the stool.

By the time I had made it out of that hole-in-the-corner joint, I was smashed and had enough pain to spare. If I had my wits about me I might have noticed the bastards that had followed me out. So I blame myself for what happened next.

I never did quite figure out until later what the hell they had against me personally, but all I knew was I made the mistake of turning down an alley to shortcut to the inn and one stepped in front of me. Not the smartest thing to do when you're alone and it's night, I know, but double vision can be a bitch. I stopped, glaring at him through glazed eyes.

"What the hell do you want?!" even my voice was a bit slurred.

They didn't say anything the other two walked up behind me, at least I could tell that much. My first mistake was the fact I took my eyes off the one in front of me. Never take your eyes off your opponent. You'll pay dearly for it. As I turned around, I felt his fist hit my cheek hard enough that I didn't feel pain at first, only a numbness. I staggered back cursing the man from here to his twenty-sixth generation. The other two grabbed my arms making me drop my suitcase and twisting them in such a way that if I struggled I'd only end up with broken arms. Okay, well one broken arm, my metal one would only be dented.

"All you alchemists are the same," he scoffed.

I couldn't quite get a good look at him past the basics, due to my condition and the poor lighting. His hair black hair seemed to be cut short. He wore a thin ragged plain shirt and pants. He looked like he belonged on the streets.

I touched my tongue to my cheek and tasted that recognizable metallic taste. Damn it!

"You're all pathetic without your alchemy," the smirk on his face was enough to piss me off alone, not to mention the fact he knew that if you separated my hands I was screwed.

I opened my mouth to speak only to get a punch in the stomach that sent me to my knees. I almost lost it right there, almost puked my guts out. A punch in the stomach mixed with drinking wasn't a good combo. The two however, let me kneel there. He then came behind me and kicked me square in the back that sent me into a puddle. It was full of slime and things I didn't want to know what the hell they were. I laid there for a moment just trying to focus on the world around me while their laughter burned.

"Come on Fullmetal! Aren't you that damn war hero?" they mocked me. "What loose your girl or something?"

I know I shouldn't have let it get to me, but I was pissed, bitter, and full of hatred. And that last comment just struck too close to the truth for my liking. Getting an idea, I grabbed the handle of my

suitcase. They didn't think anything of it. I knelt, pausing for a moment, not sure if I had the composure

to do this little trick. Screw it. With everything I had I whirled as I stood up, swing my suitcase with my

momentum making sure it caught the leader across the face. The metal corner that had been bared due to the wearing away for leather created severe cut across his face.

He cursed and it sent him staggering. The laughter stopped abruptly.

If I hadn't been drunk I could've had enough time to use my alchemy, but being what it was, that little trick cost me my own balance. In conclusion, it left me completely open. One of them swung and hit me in the chest, knocking the wind out of me. I staggered backwards which almost led to a fall on my ass. The other one was stupid enough to get in an arm's reach as I recovered. I gave him a punch in face that sent him holding his face and muttering, though I think he was trying to scream. I broke his jaw. A metal arm can do a hell a lot of damage.

Seeing this the other, one paused then looked up at me. I felt a smirk spread out to my face that cold emotionless glaze spread into my eyes letting the man know I would kill and I would do it without a regret. That must have scared the shit out of them 'cause they panicked.

Realizing I had lost one I turned only to come face to face with their little leader. The pain shot through me and my eyes widened. I staggered backwards clasping my side. The pain was so severe it was overcoming the adrenaline, searing my veins. I pulled my hand away only to see it covered with a warm dark crimson color.

The man's eyes were a bit wide announcing he had never killed anyone, the blade still in his hand and covered in my blood.

"Holy shit man, let's go!" the one who wasn't injured shouted.

I let them go, what the hell was I to do? I felt what little strength remained begin to seep away as if it was following out of my body along with my blood. I clenched my teeth holding my side with one hand and the suitcase in the other. Nothing but the primitive need to live to keep me going, making me stagger down that alleyway, leaving a train of blood mixing with the trash that had collected along the sides of the buildings. My vision wasn't the only thing that was dying on me. My body was slowly going numb. I was going into shock. That familiar way of tiredness was approaching gathering me within it's dark depths.

I watched the lights growing dimmer and dimmer until I couldn't tell if they were on or not. I began dragging my feet until my foot caught something and I fell. I laid there, staring at nothing.

Was this how the Fullmetal Alchemist was going to die? Picked off by some punk kid? No, that was just the last straw. I had begun my suicide the minute I had been drafted into that damn war. Look where it left me, in the dirt watching my own blood circle my body. I had nothing left….my morals were gone, the girl I loved -out of reach, and Al? All right, I'm sorry. I could almost see him screaming at me like when we were a younger and Scar had almost killed me with that damn arm of his. Back when we were young…I closed my eyes feeling that sleep slowly making the pain and numbness disappear…back when we were innocent…I left my grip on the world lessen…back when I gave a damn.


	6. Chapter Five: Two Sides to Every Tale

Author's Note: Yes, I have finally updated. I hope you all enjoy! Read and Review!

-Spartan-458

**Chapter Five:** _Two Sides to Every Tale_

_ 0 0 Lynn's POV 0 0 _

The first time I saw him; I wanted to just walk on and leave the damn state alchemist in his own blood. It would be a nice change since it was usually others that were soaked in their own blood, but Kendra wouldn't let me do it, not even if I had truly wanted to.

"Lynn!" she shouted at me, her hands placed on her hips.

I wish I could've acted like I didn't hear her. It would've made this hell of a lot easier, but hey, that's me. "Screw the easy road and give me a dirt bike," that's what Kendra always said about me.

I finally turned around, shaking my head, "We can't!"

"Look at him! The poor man's covered in his own blood for crying out loud!" Kendra spat at me.

I finally sighed. There's one thing you have to understand about my little city of Kingston. People reside here from all over the world, various cultures, and societies. The only reason the village can band together so well is that one thing we all have in common. Everyone in this town has either lost or felt the effects of the wars in someway or another. All this grief was the only thing that held this town together until slowly over time it turn to guilt, then to blame, and then finally to hatred. The military is despised and hated throughout the town with a vehemence like no other. It was so bad here that if I was caught associating with the military, I might as well pack up and move. Yeah, it was that bad.

So my question: why the hell am I helping some guy I have no idea who he is? He could be some convicted serial murderer for all I knew. Unfortunately, I didn't have much of an answer, yet somehow I just couldn't leave him laying there.

He looked so pathetic there. His blood had pooled around him, making his once white, crisp shirt a black as it mixed with the grim from the street. His blonde hair was a mess, laying lazily over his face. I blinked, realizing that a blood trail led back to an alley which I suspected where he came from. Shit, what had happened to him?

"So you do have a conscience, huh?" Kendra smirked at me.

Kendra was one of my closest friends. She had naturally blonde hair that was trimmed to rest just below her shoulders, though at the moment it was pulled back. Her eyes were a soft chocolate full of ambition. Out of all of us, she'd go the furthest, I could tell. She had the drive, something that I lacked at the moment.

Her top was that of a simple pink tank top with a black mini skirt. My outfit varied little from her own, mostly because she helped me pick it out. I wore a form fitting light blue spaghetti-strapped top with a short khaki skirt, however she won for showing off the most leg. How she bends over and doesn't manage to flash anyone still amazes me. Well to make it short, it was late and we were on our way home from a party we had just attended, that was when we came across him.

"Shut up Kendra and help me out," I muttered as I knelt down, ignoring the fact I was in his blood.

Kendra had decided to wait at the edge of it. I could careless. I placed my fingers upon his slim neck and there it was, his pulse beating steady.

"Well, he's alive at least." I spoke as I gently rolled him over.

"Nice to know…" she trailed off, her voice full of concern.

I don't see why she was getting all sad over this guy, we didn't even know who he was! Besides I mean…my thoughts were completely interrupted as I looked at his face. I felt my breath catch as I realized this man had to only be a year, maybe two, older than me. It was a scary concept.

"Check his pockets, maybe there is some identification." Kendra suggested as she gestured form the "sidelines."

"Why am I doing all the dirty work?" I asked as I dug through his pant's pockets.

"What if he wakes up?" she smirked.

Thanks…I knew she was only joking but still…I shook my head when I felt something cool against my palm.

It felt like something metallic and something was carved upon it. I slipped it out and both of us felt our jaw drop. He's a state alchemist! If I was caught helping him….I could only imagine what would happen to me.

"Why? Why is the one time you want to start racking up brownie points you have to pick a state alchemist!?" I snapped bitterly, my own hatred coming into play.

"Shut it, Lynn," she held my gaze with a flashing anger of her own. "You and the whole damn town needs to just shut it." I had never seen her as serious as she was at that moment. "I don't care if he's theFuhrer, himself, he's alive and laying in his own blood. We're helping him."

I glared at her and she held it until finally I gave in. I wasn't about to have a staring contest in the middle of the street on a night like this.

"Fine, help me get him up." I glared.

I grabbed his right arm only to pause. I couldn't feel any warmth through the shirt and it was harder than any rock I had touched before. I immediately pulled back the sleeve and stared. Automail…right arm.

"Oh you have _got_ to be kidding me…" I looked at him once more and it all made sense.

"What?" Kendra blinked as she gently slung his left arm over her shoulder.

"I know who this is," I stated as I took the same metallic arm and placed it over my shoulders.

It must have been comical if you had seen us for Kendra was much taller than me, so the poor guy was slightly lop-sided as we dragged him down the street.

"It's Fullmetal…" I spat.

"Fullmetal?!" she tried her best to glance at the man's face however, his head had slumped forward making it impossible to see. "_The_ Fullmetal? The war hero?" she blinked in the shock.

"Yeah," I nodded.

I should've been a lot more startled, but I wasn't. In my opinion, he got what he deserved, especially if he was a state alchemist. The military was at the top of my hate list to say the least.

"Wow…what is he doing here and like this?" she asked glancing at him once more.

"Hell if I know, I found him just like you," I snapped at her.

She blinked at me as if to say, "god, what did I do to you?" In fact, she had done nothing I was just bitter. Okay, so I was _very _bitter…leave me alone.

"Sorry, Kendra, it's just…hey, where are we going?" I cocked an eyebrow realizing that her house in the countryside was in the opposite direction.

"Your apartment, of course!" she smiled all too sweetly. It made me sick.

"WHAT!?!" She had to be kidding. I was going to take this weird _man_ into _my_ apartment!? Was she trying to kill me?

"Relax we'll just throw him on the couch," Kendra waved me off the best she could do without dropping him.

"Ah thanks, he's an alchemist Kendra. Locks won't stop him, nor anyone else for that matter." The truth was if he really wanted in to my room all he would have to do is kick the door down. It was a flimsy knob lock and the chain wouldn't do any good.

"Oh he looks like he's really going to come after you," she rolled her eyes.

Okay, she had me there. He was soaked in his own bloody and not even conscious.

It was a miracle we finally reached my duplex without having anyone stopping us. Someone was obviously watching out for us…but why?

I unlocked my shop which was on the lower half of the duplex. I own top and bottom, but we call it my duplex/apartment, only because I consider the lower half strictly store. Upstairs is my little "apartment." It's pretty cramped, my family room and kitchen are joined. In one room, there was a couch and a wooden desk with a chair and a book case. The other room held a stove, oven, and etc. There is one door which leads to my bedroom and from that a bathroom. Hey, it was made for only one person give me a break.

The three of use stumbled in, Kendra kicking the door to close it behind us. Now the stairs…dear god. It was amazing we didn't drop him down the stairs, which we almost did at one point…

We were almost there when Kendra had slipped not getting a good foothold on one step. She immediately let go of him so as not to pull him down with her. Smart move, except one thing, that left little ol' me with all his weight.

"Holy-!" I shouted staggering upon the top of the stairs this man practically laying on me. It was all I could manage to not fall over, that was when I heard Kendra's laughter.

"Kendra! Get up and help me here!" I shouted at her.

She did so, still laughing, "You better be happy he's pretty short, otherwise you'd probably have been crushed."

"What is with these midget jokes tonight?" I sighed.

I got bashed constantly for my stature at the party, annoying as it was. We finally made it through my door into my "place." It was a little place meant for one, though two wouldn't be bad. I had even added a rug to my wooden floor in the living room to make it a little more homey. What was I saying? There wouldn't be _two_ for long.

We staggered, happy to get rid of our load upon the couch. We both let out a puff, our arms killing us for dragging him all the way here. Hey, you try taking him up my flight of stairs and see how easy it is!

"Well, as much fun as that was," Kendra started placing her hands on her hips, "I've got to go."

"What? Why?" I exclaimed.

Seriously, she was leaving me here with him!? Some friend she was.

"Yeah, but you're a big girl Lynn, you can take care of yourself. Besides I'm a mess," she gestured to her top which was now smeared with blood and dirt.

Yeah well, I wasn't in much better shape for I placed my hands on my hips as if to say, "that's no excuse." She chose to ignore it however.

"I'll check in with you two tomorrow. Don't get too wild and crazy," she winked at me as she departed.

What? Oh yeah, wild and crazy. Me? She had to be kidding. "All right Fullmetal, you better be listening because I'm only going to say…this…once…" with Kendra gone I was free to notice things that I hadn't seen before.

Staring down at him, I finally realized how injured he was. A great knot was forming upon one of his cheeks. It was swelling badly, stating he had been hit quick and hard. If it hurt as much as it looked…I winced.

That was it, I immediately went into what my friends call, "Nurse Judy" mode. I grabbed a ponytail holder to place my light brown hair up. It wasn't until this moment did I finally get to see how bad a shape I was in. My slightly tanned complex was smudged with dirt and his blood. My gray eyes stared back astonished at the mess I had become. Ah, screw it.

I raced to the kitchen opening one of the tiny oak cabinets. I pulled out my first aid kit. Then I pulled a bowl out of a top cabinet and filled it with warm water. I reached in my little compact chiller and pulled out a bag of ice. It was a new invention that had come out not too long ago, handy little thing. I grabbed a rag and was set to go. Balancing the items, I was able to make it back to the living room without spilling too much water.

I set the bowl down next to me and grabbed the rag. First thing was first, time to clean the injury as I was taught. I dipped the rag into bowl ringing out the excess water. I knelt beside him as I laid the rag upon his face. I wiped the dried sweat from his brow along with the grim that had collected from him laying in the damp street. He looked so peaceful laying there and it was hard for me to believe he was that famous war hero. If you had seen him without the blood and grim he'd seem just like any other man.

I laid the cloth upon his cheek, yet he didn't wince, didn't even stir from his sleep. Wow, he must have been out. The swelling was getting worse, making that half of his face bulge. With the rate this thing was going there was no telling how big it would get. I picked up the ice bag I had created earlier. It was basically just a rag wrapped in ice but it would do. I laid it so that it settled carefully upon his bruised cheek.

Now for…the …shirt. I blinked as I began to undo the top button, realizing what I was doing. I was unbuttoning some strange guy's shirt! I felt myself get red at the thought of what that could be taken as. My imagination just loved to run off with me regardless of what I would command. I finally took a deep breath, regaining my composure. I was a professional, damn it, and I'd act like one! I watched his face for any sign incase he began to stir. I quickly undid his shirt. As soon as I was done, I withdrew.

He didn't even stir, not once. I wasn't sure if I should be happy that he hadn't waken up to see me taking off his shirt (that would've been an interesting one to explain), or concerned that he was out like a light.

When I glanced back at what I had revealed underneath the blood soaked cotton, I sat there, unable to move, my eyes widening with each part of his shirt gripped tightly in my hand. I couldn't find my voice as I stared at the sight. What….what had happened to him?

The fresh wound was deep, a knife wound. He had been stab, luckily it had missed all vitals organs. How could I tell? He wouldn't be alive now if it had. I set to work on the most important thing. I cleaned the wound carefully with the rag wiping away the excess dried blood and other grim. I then flipped open the first aid kit. Pulling out some antiseptic, a cotton pad, and a roll of gauze, I was ready to dress the wound. I pushed the gel onto the wound making sure it covered it completely. What he really needed was stitches…I laid the pad against the wound and pressed just enough to keep the blood from making a mess all over again. I then wrapped the gauze slightly around his waist finding it kinda awkward to bring it around. Making sure it applied pressure to the wound, I tied it off. I just prayed that this would work.

His chest was a mixture of scars some new, some old. There was one in particularly that twisted his flesh more than the others. It looked like at one time it had been a circular wound, but yet… I placed my fingertips upon the deformed skin. The warmth of his body was still there, however the smooth texture of his upper chest had disappeared. I knew what a bullet wound looked like but this was…it's texture was almost like a burn.

I stared up at him finding my mouth dry. I had heard of this treatment before, however it was extremely primitive and was only used as an emergency if all other procedures could not be preformed for obvious reasons. He had cauterized the wound, stopped the bleeding. Where was he that he could not get medical attention? He was a state alchemist, the army tried very hard to make sure they didn't lose them in wars.

It was then that his arm caught my attention. The scar it created was disturbing, reaching much further than his prosthetic limb did. I ran my fingers over the structure and limb, the cold contrast to the warm skin. Whoever had constructed this was a fine craftsmen, very fine. It consisted of many parts however allowed for maneuverability. It looked firm enough that no strength was lost. I paused careful to make sure he hadn't stirred before looking back at this old wound. I gently laid my finger upon the ridge of where metal met skin. I traced the line finding it controversial to have the coolness of metal and human warmth in one touch. The skin was soft though, tender from being connected with such a harsh material. I knew of automail, how each nerve had to be surgerically attached to each wire. The patient had to remain awake as well for how else would they be able to tell if the nerve had been connected or not? Yet the look of the scar…it was faded compared to that of the one at his side. So that meant... I shook my head, he must have had the surgery at a young age, a surgery in which most adults wouldn't even attempt.

I couldn't feel as much as an ass as I did at the moment. I withdrew my hand, holding it to me. I had thought he deserved to die back there. I thought I could judge him strictly on the basis he was a state alchemist. It turns out…I didn't know shit.

I carefully pulled the shirt off one arm then the other and then slipped it out from underneath him. It was a nice cut white shirt, too bad it was covered blood. I threw it in ball upon the wooden floor. I could take care of it later. I looked at his pants. Sorry, I drew the line there. Seriously what the hell was I going to say if he woke up and saw me taking off his pants? Yeah…

With the rag bloody I laid it back in the bowl. He was clean now and his wounds were dressed in was the best I could offer him. I then stood up and walked over to the closet. Pulling out a clean sheet I laid it on top of him, covering his bare chest. I then bent down to take care of the mess.

I hated the military as much as the next person and yet…god, what a fool I was, a complete hypocrite. Here I was helping the man! Damn it, Kendra! What was I to do if someone found out?! I washed out the bowl in the bath tub and laid it out to dry. Seriously, I was a woman letting some strange guy I hadn't even met into my apartment. And he was an alchemist for crying out loud, all he had to do…so my locks were pretty much worthless. Was that not asking for trouble or what? Yet there was something there. I couldn't explain it even if I wanted. I should've hated his guts. I should've left him there to rot, yet I just couldn't. It was a lame excuse.

I turned on the sink in the bathroom and filled it. I threw in his shirt. I'd let it sit for the night, hopefully it'd remove most of the blood. It looked so nice too. I let out a sigh as I shut the water off watching the clear liquid turn to a pale pink.

What had I gotten myself into? Dad? Brother? If your out there here my cry. Please…please help me…

As futile as the attempt was I locked the chain and knob. I then grabbed the chair from the desk and used it to prop up against the door. Okay, so even if it didn't stop him at least it'd give me enough time to react. I was a fool for doing this I kept telling myself that. It went against every logical sense I had yet something told me to just wait, to just hold out a bit. Damn, instinct, even if it is right it can still be a pain in the ass…


End file.
